School starts of Friday, August 1. Unfortunately for us, we’re still on the waiting list for day care. We live in a residential area dubbed as a “new town.” And I guess this must be the reason why we’re still on the waiting list. There are more kids than day care centers around us. My only option now is to ask my parents-in-law to come live with us until my son is accepted at the nearest 어린이집 or children’s house.
Day care here is relatively cheap. The basic pay depends on how old the child is. For my two-year old son, we’ll have to pay about 270,000 won (US$270) a month. That is 12 hours a day, 5 days a week. Of course, we’ll also have to pay for his food and other things that he might need. My husband’s friend who also has a two year old pays 420,000 won (US$420) a month for his child’s day care and that includes everything.
My sister-in-law is actually volunteering to take care of my son. However, her house is a 40-minute drive from us and it would be difficult for me to take my son there. I also think that a day care is better since he’ll interact with more kids.
I only two more days to find a day care for my son… time is ticking so fast!
We are always busy on weekends. My husband leaves for work at 8AM everyday and is usually home at 8PM. He spends more than two hours a day traveling to and from work daily. As much as he’d like to come home earlier, it’s not just in Korean culture to leave earlier than the boss. My husband isn’t alone as most Korean fathers spend a lot of time working and even drinking socially at night.
Our weekends are reserve for the family. There are times though that I go out with my girl friends for lunch on a Saturday and my husband usually takes his turn the following weekend for his hiking trip.
I think we’re lucky that we live in Seoul. There are a lot of parks and zoos that we can go to to spend time as a family. Our favorite place is the Children’s Grand Park, which is about a 30-minute drive from our apartment. It has a zoo, swimming pool, soccer field, carnival rides, camel and horse ride, playground and of course, picnic grounds. I just love love going there ‘coz it’s free.
I’ve noticed that a lot of young families also spend their weekends going to such places. Fathers accompanying and playing with their kids while the moms (like moi) takes pictures. I guess this is really a time we’d have to take advantage of being a family since there will come a time when our son would surely prefer to go out with his friends instead of us. Talking from experience? You bet.
Less than a month from now, I’m going back to school. The last time I was in school was almost a decade ago. Two weeks from now, I’ll be sending my son to the 어린이집 or literally the children’s house, a Korean day care center. I’m a bit worried though.
I’m a stay-at-home mom and I’ve been with my son on a daily basis for the past 25 months. The only time I was away from him was when I visited New York City with my sister and it was just for a night. I’m not worried about my son because I know he’ll be taken care of by the trusty teachers at the center. I’m worried about myself. Will I be able to handle being away from my son on a daily basis?
I never thought I’d be worried about weaning myself from my son. I hope I’ll be able to concentrate in school, not thinking about what my son is doing while I’m in class. I guess I’ll just have to think that a few hours of separation and my son being with other kids is not such a bad idea.
My son is 25 months old. I talk to him in English (and sometimes Korean) while his father speaks to him in pure Korean. We had a lot of opposition when we decided to teach our son two languages. The women in my husband’s family were afraid that he might not learn enough Korean since I spend more time with him than my husband. They were worried that by the time he goes to school, he might not be that fluent in the language and he might end up a “wang-ta” or an outsider. The men in the family thinks he’ll eventually learn the language later.
I did a lot of reading on raising a bilingual child. All are in agreement that the best time to teach a child a language is when he’s still a baby. I don’t remember my son’s first word now but he can speak more Korean than English although he understands instructions in both languages. He isn’t as verbal yet as the other kids his age. I’m not worried though. He’s only 2 years old after all.
When I first had my child, I noticed that some parents are intentionally or unintentionally always competing. It’s like their children are the affirmation of their being. I would think it’s specially true in Korea where competition is so stiff. Parents expect a lot from their kids, pushing them to study hard, get into a really nice university and land a job at one of the big conglomerates in the country. (In the hope that they’d be taken care of nicely when they grow old?)
My husband and I often talk about how we’re going to raise our son differently, he isn’t an average kid here after all. His parents are from two different countries with different native languages. We often talk about our son’s future and what we’d like him to be when he grows up. When we see him dancing to Baby Bop Hop’s song (of Barney’s fame), we thought “ah he’s gonna be a dancer like Bi (Rain).” When we catch him disassembling his toy car, we’d say “maybe he’ll be an engineer someday.” And when we saw him imitating the news anchor on TV, we conclude that at his early age of two he’ll be a TV personality.
What do we really want our child to be when he grows up? It’s his life so it’s his choice. We’ll just gladly guide him and proudly cheer for him whatever he decides to be just like what our own parents did with us. Whether he decides to be a doctor, lawyer, teacher, social worker, engineer or a traveler, we’ll be there for him as long as he’s happy and he’s not hurting anyone.
SAHM is an acronym for “stay-at-home-mom” while WAHM means “work-at-home-mom”. I’ve been a SAHM for more than two years and sometimes that makes me feel guilty for not being able to contribute to our household finances. However, I’m pretty sure that working outside would also make me feel guilty for not being there for my toddler whenever he needs me. Good thing it’s now possible for me and other mothers out there to earn some bucks and take care of their little ones all at the same time. Guilt-free!
Surfing through other websites showed me the way to SocialSpark. How can I and other mothers earn through them? Stay-at-home, do the laundry, cook meals, take care of the little ones and BLOG! For me, blogging is not just a way to unwind or release stress. It is now also a way for me to earn something and not feel guilty about getting that leather bag I’ve been dying to have for so long. I could also earn and save money to buy gifts for my husband on his birthday or on our anniversaries without having to spend HIS money.
Not only is SocialSpark a money-making site for moms, it’s also a great way to meet other mommy bloggers. I’ve met former SAHM and now WAHM through the site and we’re all proud to be part of this great network.
To sum up, SocialSpark is for moms who want to earn money and not feel guilty about it. It’s a place where advertisers and bloggers meet. It’s a social network for WAHMs too!
I’m a first time mom living in a foreign country where English is not an official language. I remember that when I was pregnant, I worried a lot. I thought I wouldn’t be a good mother able to take care of a newborn. Looking back, I got a lot of help from BabyCenter and I still visit the site from time to time.
I just love Babycenter as it has all the information one could ever need from preconception until your child is 9! I love the birth clubs most of all. I could interact with other moms and read about their experiences too.
Another website I frequent is Ask Dr. Sears. I’d seen Dr. Sears and his family in Dr. Phil’s show. The FAQ in the site is really helpful for nervous moms like me.
Being in a foreign country and not being in constant contact with the women in my family made me just glad that those sites are available. They’ve been saving me for more than two years now!
My son was supposed to be born on June 12, two years ago. However I had an early birth on May 24th. Before that, I always thought of giving him the name “Jayu” which means “freedom,” since his birthday was supposed to fall on the Philippines’ Independence Day. However, I couldn’t just follow my whim and we had to respect tradition.
Traditionally, Korean names consist of three syllables. The first syllable is the family name, second and third are either the generation name or given name. If you’ve been watching Korean dramas, you’d noticed that siblings usually share a common name. That’s what’s called the “generation name”. It’s really just intended for the boys in the family. In my husband’s family, their generation name is “Yong” (용) so him and his siblings all have “Yong” in their names.
I first thought that I should find a really nice name for my son, not very Korean since I thought that Korean names sound a bit different. However, I realized that he’s going to live here and we’re going to raise him here so it’s not really that important to have a nice-sounding name based on Filipino standards.
My son’s name is Seong Gyu (성규). It’s a combination of his father’s given name (용성 Yong Seong) and his generation name (규 Gyu). His male cousins also use that generation name. Like I said, only the boys in the family really follow that tradition.
Korean names are based on Chinese characters. So the same name might have different meanings and it all depends on their Chinese origin.
Have you ever heard of this song? It was popular several years ago. When I had my son two years ago, I listened to this almost every day.
I HOPE YOU DANCE
Lee Ann Womack
I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat
But always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small
When you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you’ll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance
I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Living might mean taking chances
But they’re worth taking
Lovin’ might be a mistake
But it’s worth making
Don’t let some hell bent heart
Leave you bitter
When you come close to selling out
Reconsider
Give the heavens above
More than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a real and constant motion always)
I hope you dance
(Rolling us along)
I hope you dance
(Tell me who)
I hope you dance
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
(Where those years have gone)
I hope you still feel small
When you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you’ll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
Dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a real and constant motion always)
I hope you dance
(Rolling us along)
I hope you dance
(Tell me who)
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
I hope you dance
(Where those years have gone)
(Tell me who)
I hope you dance
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
(Where those years have gone)
